Pastor Wa's Blog

Personalities notwithstanding, there is a way to talk to Men. It may sound incredulous at first, but hang with me. It sometimes seems almost impossible to get through to a man's thick skull. It's like hitting your fist against a wall trying to have him listen, co-operate and fully grasp with intent everything you are trying to tell him. Well, here's the biggest mistake most women make in their attempt to talk to the masculine type. They talk to them like they talk to women. And it fails Every-time. Surprised? well, you shouldn't be. Men are different from women, especially when it comes to 'hearing'. By that, it's not just what you're churning from your mouth, nope. It's two critical components of any conversation. Tone of voice and body language. 1. When you talk to a man, make sure you get into his head before you start rolling. Men process one thing at a time. If a guys mind is on something, he may be looking at you, smiling at you, holding ...

First up, apologies for not posting for a while. My involvement with a new online project, plus looking for the elusive dollar has kept me away. But I'm back. So here goes! The golden age of fine wining and dining has seemingly been replaced by our quick instant lifestyles that allow very little time for anything. microwaves, email, instant coffee, MTV, Tyra Banks, Maina and Kingangi in the morning.... its all fast paced. And so has the approach to relationships become. Kila kitu ni chap chap. Including the meet-ups. We do twitter, Facebook, then Sms, by the time a week is over, we are having sex online. That's just how fast paced its become. But I'm not complaining about it, its just that now, because of how easy it is to meet someone and talk over gadgets without physically taking the effort to be there and work on the relationships, there is a group of young men who honestly have no idea on how to treat a woman. Zero Bilaz Wako dooooooooooown! So it...

Some people have no sense of respect whatsoever for other’s personal spaces Part of the challenge in being African and having all things in common is that people will tend to feel like they are responsible and have to have a say so in your life. Like it’s up to them to know and be involved with what’s happening to you. Now, this does one of two things 1.        1.  Creates very dependent people who cannot think or move without someone else saying so 2.         2.  Very frustrated individuals who have to put up with nosey ‘friends’ Let’s talk about the second bunch. The others will be addressed later. If you are a private person, you want your personal time to be respected. Period. That’s not up for discussion. It’s your sanctuary. Your refuge. The place where all things that you are processing and sorting through in your mind and emotions get resolved. It’s an extremely crucial thing that your personal time is not meddled with. By ...

When people believe stuff, especially when it’s taught them during a needy time of their life, they can tend to give allegiance to levels that would make you cringe. Unnecessarily What you believe determines your choices, that’s why in my work as a coach and pastor, I don’t try to change behavior. It never works. It never will. I choose to work smart. I investigate your beliefs and experiences. It doesn’t change that I still can’t stand people that make stupid choices in the name of Christianity. I refuse the notion that being a Christian and being dumb have anything in common. It’s actually the opposite Proverbs says it. It calls that being a fool, and terribly cautions us against it. So I can’t stand when people tell others not to do anything about relationships going bad or marriages on the rocks in the name of prayer and waiting on God Sorry but I don’t buy that. That’s monkey business God will not do your part in this life That’s why He says, ‘come we reason together’ Otherwise wh...

Women are entrusted with an incredible gift. I believe it's from God. I honestly do. It's called intuition.  The dictionary defines it as; D irect perception of truth, fact, etc, independent of any reasoning process; immediate apprehension. Wow! I wonder how many women have sat down and thought this through. I wonder how many husbands have thought this through when they are about to make huge life changing decisions. Direct perception of truth! I think it was meant to protect women and their families from danger. Smart women use it. They understand what they have. And don't hesitate to employ it when the moment demands. And it does. Many many times. Every woman will face opportunities and situations where use of her intuition will become handy. Even lifesaving. An ability to have direct perception of truth, fact, etc., independent of any reasoning process; immediate apprehension. Gut feeling. Especially on matters of love. It seems to me women allow their feelings to...

Anger rests in the bosom of fools. That's the Bible, not some grey haired Philosopher seated somewhere sipping Lime cola. And I Agree. To rest mean's to abide. To make home at. To be free at. Angry people are souls that have decided to stay angry and execute actions stemming from their feelings. They feel entitled to live out their anger and unleash it on others. They have decided to allow anger dwell and abide in their life. Their reasons are as varied as their are interesting. It could be hurt, being taken advantage off, childhood tapes, or just plain ol' bad manners. Anger is real. It's a valid human emotion that can be used to right a wrong, or fight an injustice It's what helps us make choices to protect ourselves from being taken advantage of or even abused. Even so, anger can be a terrible master. With mighty and destructive power. And an ability to really hurt others, and to do so with incredible cruelty. Ask anyone that's been in a relati...

So does age really matter? A lady with a boyfriend   talked to me a while back. She was In a dilemma. She had prayed and waited for someone that would love her and make her feel special. After many years and much waiting, that person eventually did come. He was handsome, tall, loved her, was funny, mature, responsible, made her feel like a girl… and craziest thing of all,   was dying to marry her. She couldn’t resist this was real, and she was falling. Fast. The only problem was, this answer to her prayer was   11 years younger! Bummer! Or was it? The question whether age matters will not go away. I’m not sure how it came about that women must be younger than the men they marry… and I will not even delve into that. The cultural aspect of that has been with us for ages. So does age really matter? Well get ready for it, Yes It does, otherwise this wouldn’t be such an emotion provoking subject But it matters in ways much more different than we think. And as such is worth exp...