When the person you are with is a B.O.R.E

Sometimes, when relationships go through cycles, some of the stages can almost seem to contradict the very life and purpose of that relationship. You may be with someone that was very exciting in the initial stages. Love is an interesting thing. It really is like a drug high, in the beginning, you are basically are on another planet. You can’t think, your reasoning goes bonkers, they are the perfect human being, suddenly no one understands you at all, you can do anything for them… blah blah.. you know what I mean.
Then for some reason, especially after some time of interaction, (not necessarily sexual), you hit a wall or plateau of sorts. Suddenly, they are boring, or they are not crative or just plotless, or just plain old boring! Many people don’t understand this stage, and they either, 1. Push it further-Let’s get more physical, lets run away, or something crazy like that…. 2. They begin to salivate on what’s cooking on their next door neighbors grill!
If you have ever gotten to this point, well, lemme help you. They may not necessarily be a bore or the relationship ending. Sometimes its your body’s way of saying, I’ve had enough hormones! Give me a break! Or it could be that you need to look at more creative ways to spice up the relationships.
One of the things I’ve found that causes this to happen to relationships is when we have cut out other people from the relationships and its just us two and no more. A few hints may help.
1. Engage some people with you. Visit and spend time with people that are ‘different’ from you. You will be surprised at how your mind will be stimulated in ‘other new ways’ and you may find yourself looking at your friend differently.
2. Don’t get physical. Kissing, heavy petting, sex, only accentuates and intensifies the ‘withdrawal symptoms on the cycle’. The interesting thing is, keeping off physically actually helps you desire each other more. You need to recognize it’s just a phase.
3. Quit drooling over the neighbors grill: That other jamaa isn’t all that you may be thinking. That chic may not be more exciting than the one you are with. It’s just a matter of perception! Because of how your feelings are responding. Oh, and it will take just as much work to get it up to speed with another person if you choose to end the current relationship.
4. Don’t say things you shouldn’t: remember, you are only feeling this way because it’s just a stage in your relationship, so you don’t want to trash that person that loves and cares for you. It’s so easy to say nasty things to people we love, because they irritate us so! Just don’t give in to the temptation.
5. Find a way to “give’ to your relationship: Go out of your way to really do something special for the other person. Buy them a nice gift, take them out for a meal, go watch a movie (Great because you do very little talking during a movie), or take them to their shags!
6. If they are truly boring, and I mean BORING, then maybe it’s time to find someone else! Just ask yourself what caused you to end up with a bore in the first place so you don’t repeat your mistakes again!
There you go, and if you are a Bore, I have a suggestion for you, go get a creativity shower! You may be stinking the whole relationship!
I’m just saying…

Comments

mo'z dimension said…
lol!! pastor wa! m getting me a creativity shower,that sheds a lot of light.
October 6, 2010 at 5:07 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Single Ladies, Get your own man!

Image
So I was reading that Linda Muthama proudly calls herself Nyambane’s second wife. He is managing more than just her ‘music affairs’ as well. Has a baby by him and the usual blah blah… By the way, all this has happened a while back And of course as usual, it was fodder for the blogs and media. Worst of all, there were chics telling Linda to do what she wants, it’s her life. Now, I don’t know whether to just rant or try and put this entire mountain of a relationship stink-hog in perspective. Because something stinks. And it stinks to high heaven. Someone ought to call it what it is; Relationship bull. When a single young woman of notable influence in this country, goes ahead and becomes a second wife to a man of equal media exposure and women go ahead and cheer her on, something is wrong! Terribly wrong! You see the truth of the matter is; you single young thing, building a man, a marriage and a family is work. Loads of it. By the time you see a ‘made’ man, some of you
Read more

Manners Please boys

Image
First up, apologies for not posting for a while. My involvement with a new online project, plus looking for the elusive dollar has kept me away. But I'm back. So here goes! The golden age of fine wining and dining has seemingly been replaced by our quick instant lifestyles that allow very little time for anything. microwaves, email, instant coffee, MTV, Tyra Banks, Maina and Kingangi in the morning.... its all fast paced. And so has the approach to relationships become. Kila kitu ni chap chap. Including the meet-ups. We do twitter, Facebook, then Sms, by the time a week is over, we are having sex online. That's just how fast paced its become. But I'm not complaining about it, its just that now, because of how easy it is to meet someone and talk over gadgets without physically taking the effort to be there and work on the relationships, there is a group of young men who honestly have no idea on how to treat a woman. Zero Bilaz Wako dooooooooooown! So it's easy
Read more

How to talk to Men

Image
Personalities notwithstanding, there is a way to talk to Men. It may sound incredulous at first, but hang with me. It sometimes seems almost impossible to get through to a man's thick skull. It's like hitting your fist against a wall trying to have him listen, co-operate and fully grasp with intent everything you are trying to tell him. Well, here's the biggest mistake most women make in their attempt to talk to the masculine type. They talk to them like they talk to women. And it fails Every-time. Surprised? well, you shouldn't be. Men are different from women, especially when it comes to 'hearing'. By that, it's not just what you're churning from your mouth, nope. It's two critical components of any conversation. Tone of voice and body language. 1. When you talk to a man, make sure you get into his head before you start rolling. Men process one thing at a time. If a guys mind is on something, he may be looking at you, smiling at you, holding
Read more